Right toe cured!

Lanced this afternoon by a friend. Toe and needle prepped with Betadine in the usual medical school nerd fashion. Serous fluid actually shot across the room. Right toe now pain free but still purple colored. Left toe still hurting, but no sign of blister.

Too tired to concentrate, going to bed. But first:

Oh, I guess it's not as bad as I thought!




OH WAIT, IT IS



I'm almost entirely sure that the toenail isn't supposed to be 1. HURTING and 2. riding so high above my actual toe





Comparison same-toe-other-side normal shot:

Feeling overwhelmed

I don't think I have ever felt this bad and good at the same time before.

I would say that, despite my 1st day on my SubI being relatively low key, I am already feeling pretty stressed out. And this is day 1 of 30...

Today, I woke up at 5 to round at 6, then hung out in the OR until about 4:30, but didn't do much except for watch people operate in a hole that I could not see into. I hate being the 3rd wheel on thoracotomies. Basically, you watch people's hands move around, but you can't see any of the important stuff the fingers are doing. Oh, and I failed at cutting sutures about 4 times in a row because I was holding the Metzes upside down. I cannot help it if I have not been in the OR in about 9 months. Then, the fellow let the PA close, even though he wasn't even in the effing case. The PA comes in from the other room as we are about to start closing, and the attending let's him close with the fellow! WTF?! I don't effing stand around for 4 hours doing nothing to.... do nothing. I do it so I can help close the damn case. And then to add insult to injury, I watch the PA lock the running dermals five times in a row, and then do some weird double-locked stitch that I didn't previously think was possible. AND HE DIDN'T GET CAUGHT. Don't get me wrong, because the PA is one of my favorite people on the team so far, but I was just a little disappointed.

I got to go home around 6:45, then went out for a run around 7:10. Came home at 8:25, stretched, showered, made dinner, and ate it. Now it's 9:30. I need to go to bed soon because I'm on call tomorrow, and rounds are at 5:30 and I need to be in at 5:00 to preround. This means getting up around... 4:10. IN THE MORNING. THIS IS ONLY 6 AND A HALF HOURS FROM NOW. AND I HAVEN'T STARTED MY WORK.

I need to check the OR schedule and quickly review the procedures, I need to work on my ERAS residency application, and I need to do some damn research for this project that should have been done years ago. Also, I asked a prof for a letter of recommendation, and she said yes verbally, but now I'm emailing her and I haven't heard back.

I'm overwhelmed and tired and just want to go to sleep.

But at the same time, I kind of feel so good. I did a double tempo run tonight - warmup + half hour tempo run + 5 min slower pace + half hour tempo run + cooldown. I'm lying in bed right now and everything is kind of buzzing from my waist down. All my muscles are a little sore and tired, and I really need a personal masseuse, but as I'm laying here, it feels painful in a really good way....

::sigh:: just needed to vent. I'd post pictures of my toe, which I am sure does not look like it should, but I am too tired. The differential right now is black toenail that will fall off vs. blister underneath the toenail with unclear prognosis.

Uh oh

This is gross, but the three people who read this blog have already seen my toes...





We'll see how this goes.

Random thoughts while I decompress before sleep

1. I think my favorite new thing to do is steal the boyfriend's denim while he's away. There is a certain pair I want v. badly, but he won't give them to me. And, he's taken them with him to Maine for the next two weeks (I think on purpose), thus depriving me of any chance to lounge around and ride the motorcycle with them on (guy's jeans are theeeee most comfortable things to ride in!).

Sorry for the crappy image, but here they are:



2. Run tomorrow with fellow Andover native Em! Am all packed and ready to go!

3. Loch Raven 10 mile LSD this weekend, hopefully 18 miler next weekend? YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Photo dump: Roy's, run, and Korean BBQ

Photos!

Pear and goat cheese and caramelized macadamia nut salad mmm


Prosciutto-wrapped shrimp with fried rice and an EXTRA RUNNY EGG

Wasabi tuna steak for Raghu


Molten chocolate cake a la mode with raspberry syrup


Happy because the 16.5mile run is over and I burned off all the extra calories from the chocolate cake.


I don't really like Korean BBQ, so I got rice cake and pork and leek dumpling soup!

16.5, did it!

Yippee, and it felt arguably better than when I did 14.5. No official TNT run today, so dragged Ryan along with me, poor thing. Ryan is a lot faster for me, so of course running at my pace is pretty uncomfortable, but he helped me along anyways. Ate gummy snacks along the way, but still will need to figure out better hydration plan than... Monkton. Ran into TNTers Joel, who I met a while ago on a group run, and Bruce, oh, only the founder of TNT, and we chatted a bit. They told Ryan I was a tough cookie! Yes!

Will update later, must go cram for the Neuro shelf.